Friday, June 24, 2011

Back to Work

I'm sure you've noticed that I haven't been blogging much lately. My 1-2 time per week posting schedule has sort of gone out the window this past month. It's not because I don't have anything to say, it's just that I've found myself using my time for other things lately. It's not that I don't think blogging is a worthwhile use of my time. It's more that I have such limited time right now that other things (such as chores) take priority. Cleaning the floors, for example, has become a recent priority as JC has discovered mobility. She's not quite crawling yet, but she does this sort of "froggie shuffle," where she propels herself forward on her belly (literally, on her belly), by pulling herself with her arms and pushing off with her feet together. She's actually quiet adept at it and she can get moving quite quickly. And, if I don't want her shirts and dresses looking like used Swiffer sheets, I have to stay on top of the sweeping, vacuuming and floor-washing.

More than anything, though, the recent time crunch is a result of my decision to go back to work. I didn't expect that I would go back to work early (JC is 8.5 months), let alone full-time, but here I go! On Monday, in fact! Yes, it was a tough decision, but I think it's a good one. My husband will be able to claim the rest of the parental benefits, so he can stay home with JC for the summer and still make a bit of money.

I have to admit that I was pretty excited to be offered this full-time position initially. That first day I felt pretty awesome. However, the next morning I woke up thinking about how I'd be "abandoning" JC to go back to work and I cried ... A LOT. I spent the next week crying most days, feeling like I was never going to see her again. After chatting with some friends and my mom, I started to look at the return more optimistically rather than as "impending doom." ("Impending doom" describes, to a tee, how I had been perceiving my return.)

Now I'm trying to think of it as just another activity that I'll be doing on weekdays. I'll still get up in the morning and cuddle my little bean, and nurse her and feed her breakfast and get her dressed. But, instead of being the one to put her down for her morning nap, I'll let her daddy do it, and I'll go out for the day (to work). I'm sure I'll miss her during the day when I'm not busy, but I'll be home before 5 o'clock most days, so we'll still have plenty of time in the evenings (she goes to bed ~9:30 pm). I'll miss 2-3 feeds while I'm at work, so I intend to pump so that she can take it by sippy cup or bottle.

So, why has this upcoming employment interrupted my blogging routine? Well, I guess in a way I'm nesting. I know, it makes it sound as if I'm about to go into labour again, but it makes sense that I'd be nesting again. I'm rushing around trying to tie up all the loose ends before things get really busy. My to-do list is a mile long and so it leaves little time for blogging. I hope to continue to write posts, but please forgive me if they are not as regular as they once were.


  1. Jacquie,
    You of all people are capable of still being the best of moms and working. I know you can do this! Of course it will be hard, but remember, Jillian will always know how much you love her and how important she is in you life.
    Best of luck to you as you return back to work to help so many other people!